The way I think, is because of the way I'm made, or is it?!

All my life I have thought differently from the world around me, regarded as stubborn and maybe rebellious. BUT is this true, yes in some ways that could be true, but in others definitely not true.
I recognise that some of my thought patterns are not always healthy, especially in regard to friendship/relationship. Feeling isolated and lacking in friends has been an ongoing theme throughout my life.
For most of my life up until 2005, when I received the diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome (Autism), which went some way to explaining this particular difficulty in my life, I struggled with making long term friendships, partly due to circumstances, but mainly due to my lack of skill in this area, and because I find this area particularly difficult, it affects my life and my thoughts at times on a daily basis.

I have the ongoing relationship with Jesus, but I still find that hard at times, although I love him as a closer than close friend. This is a different kind of relationship, as it is not in the physical reality, but in the heaven reality that I relate to him.So I find

Following conversations, missing words, adding words that someone never said, are all things I have to cope with. The effort to function requires extra energy and concentration to achieve, something which others do naturally.
Intimate relationship is something I crave, such as marriage, but I also find challenging to think about as I often feel that I can barely function in this world on my own, and have difficulties, with understanding my mum whom I have lived with since I was in her womb, with maybe  2 months of my whole life, away from her. How would I cope with and relate to someone who barely knows me and does not wholly understand my needs and how would I understand him, and cope with life together.

These thoughts are part of my reality, so how do I change them, when I cannot change my reality.
I can change feeling sorry for myself thoughts, by being more positive about the future.
I can change thoughts that relate to things that I do, by not doing them.
I can also allow destructive,worry thoughts to be dealt with by handing them over to Jesus.
Which I have done and still do very quickly.
In recent weeks I have begun to feel the need for deeper friendship and community that is not so sparsely spread in my world.
Heaven has spoilt me for this world, in some ways but I am here to help God change things, and as things stand. feeling lonely does not help this.

Sandy Hook and Colombine - result of a perversion of an idea from America's forefathers

I am not american and I have no agenda other than the truth about the situation  I see in America regarding guns. I have looked at and read the US constitution several times in the last few years, for varying reasons, and I have no problem with the owning of a handgun or a shotgun in the house as protection against intruders or people who plan to attack your family. The owning of a personal firearm is not the issue.
Why is this my business? I know one person from America who hold what believe has become a perverted view of what owning a gun means.
 You see the freedom to own a gun for protection, has turned into have as many guns as you like and it is your right to do what you like with them as long as you have a licence.

I have seen news items, documentaries, lists of killings in the hundreds, that may soon be in the thousands in places like Chicago. Then there are Sandy Hook and Colombine. Yes, I am not American but I am a Human being, and when a fellow Christian who is teaching me makes a comment that suggests he supports gun owning, when hundreds are being killed every day all over America. Then I have a problem, because he is saying not just the freedom to own a gun but it is OK, to use it outside the home and in the car.
The minute that becomes OK, then military type machine guns are OK.

I personally believe that Colombine and Sandy Hook were able to happen because guns were available to the individuals who committed those crimes, but it was the type of guns that enabled so many children and young people to be killed.

Owning a gun has become a perversion of the original bill of rights, mainly due to modern technology, I have a suspicion that the founding fathers of  federal Republic would shed tears of Sadness at the tragedy that is unfolding before your eyes.

When somebody from America stands before me and makes the comment I believe I have the right to look at and to say the truth that I see and to say that I have a problem with the attitude displayed as it does not equate to true Christian belief, but somewhere along the way it has become that. Why should people live in fear that they or their children will one day be the ones to be at the barrel of a gun that can kill them just so the minority can have killing machines in their possession, that frankly I have problem seeing in the military.
None of it makes any sense and I feel that there is kind of brainwashing that it is our right so it is acceptable.
I say NO,NO,NO a hundred times NO.  Because it is A SICKNESS that damages society.

In Britain we don't have a freedom of guns law, but guns are becoming an issue in London, and the odd case of people being put in prison, because they shot an intruder who had no business being there.